I don’t often swear but tonight . . . the air was blue. This week at work has been horrid, the third in a row and I’m fed up with being treated badly.
Last night I was supposed to be going out with friends, my turn to drive. I set off in heavy rain, to pick up friend number one about three miles away, but pretty soon turned back because I was aquaplaning, and the fifteen mile drive to friend number two would have involved three miles of winding, potholed, single track lane with high hedges, ditches on the sides and pitch darkness. Result, beans on toast and an early night instead of a nice pub dinner and a good belly laugh.
So today I arrive home from work with the beginnings of a bug that’s going around the office – people bring their germs to work these days to share, because if you go sick you have to face a ‘return to work interview’. If you are sick too often you get monitored and then sent to occupational health. Luckily, in the three plus years I’ve been there I’ve only clocked up two sick days.
I thought I’d sit with a cup of tea; check my email and WordPress reader to shake off the stress.
Of course the broadband didn’t work! I checked the connections, nothing happened. I reset the router, nothing happened. I turned it all off and back on again, nothing happened. I thought perhaps the same bad weather that stopped play last night may be causing the problem so l left it, cooked dinner, watched some TV and then tried again. And again, then I started swearing.
Eventually I called the broadband provider, was in a queue for twenty five minutes, and then I got cut off. I dialled again and after eighteen minutes I finally spoke to a girly that had me jumping through hoops, giving her an endless stream of passwords, mother’s maiden name and the date of birth of the cocker spaniel that belonged to my second cousin when she was five.
Next I had to unplug, re-plug, unscrew parts of sockets and rummage through drawers to find spare white plastic thingy’s that came with the original package four years ago. None of it worked and she told me she would have to get an engineer to call back and asked what time on Saturday would be best. Saturday, that’s not tomorrow, I squealed, how on earth could I manage until then? I could tell that she felt sorry for me but there was nothing she could do so I said goodbye with the thought that perhaps the time had come to check out some other providers.
While watching TV I had the company of a certain Border Terrorist, Dido, curled up beside me demanding that I gave her a tummy rub and giving me a look of disgust every time I paused for a second. This same fur baby has a wicker toy box below the shelf with the router. She gets frustrated when she can’t find her favourite toy of the day and chews on whatever she can find instead.
Have you guessed yet?
It’s laugh or cry time!
In my post earlier, photos in sepia tints for Cee’s Challenge, I mentioned being busy and that my grandmother used to say I would meet myself coming back. Seonaid from http://breathofgreenair.wordpress.com/ asked what I might say to myself if I did!
It’s an interesting thought isn’t it?
My snap reaction was ‘Oh no not you again’ but then I thought on.
‘Stop chasing your tail’
or maybe ‘Smell the roses’
‘We each have an alloted number of heartbeats, don’t waste them’
‘You spread yourself too thin’
‘But there’s so much world’
‘Have we met?’
‘Sloooww dooown’,'Where’s the fire’,'Tell me a story’,'Is it ready yet?’
So how to stop the relentless chase of life in our high tech world? Are you the same? are you always overloaded? Maybe you don’t see it as a problem, maybe I don’t. It’s just the way it is, I’m a Gemini, quicksilver. I want to experience as many things as I can in this lifetime with all of my senses. To meet and listen to as many people as possible, to have them share their stories, to touch people in some small way.
So tell me, are you the same? If so what would you say to yourself? If you can, maybe you could share with our community.
Seonaid, I suspect you’re far too mindful to rush around as much as I do!
Spotted this evening, I was too scared to get close enough to photograph these monsters very well, as it is I will probably be awake all night wondering if I will be mobbed by a million of them when I go out the door in the morning!I know I’m a wuss, but I’m not frightened of heights and other things that scare some people.
A search revealed that they are Misumena Vatia, crab spiders that can change colour to match their backgound, which at the moment is acid yellow, dwarf euphorbia. It was 8.30 pm so not the best light to get an accurate color but they really are the same colour as the plant. Anyway even if I liked spiders (did I mention I don’t?) I wouldn’t like these sneaky beasties because they hide in their camouflage and grab hoverflies and BEES that stop by to feed on nectar. I took one photo with the pruners so you can see just what mammoth giants they are – help!!!
Julia acknowledges that we may take the ‘left field’ with her prompt this week so I saw this as a double edged challenge.
Join in at http://jfb57.wordpress.com/2013/05/06/100-word-challenge-for-grown-ups-week88/
From the Balcony
Parting is such sweet sorrow. Must I utter those words whilst spittle oozes from that pustular mouth? How many times must I spy the rise in his hose and the curl in his leer? He is too long in the tooth to dally as Romeo, canst thou not see? Whilst I, still a mere slip of a boy, I can still appear as a maiden fair, fresh from her mother’s breast.
Good Master Shakespeare, hear my plea, rid me of this Roman. My friend, bring me instead your countryman, the bonny Marlowe, the beauteous serpent to assuage my sorrow. Make haste, on the morrow.
We have new housekeepers, that’s the name for the army of people who keep our offices clean these days. Often, they are invisible, in at the crack of dawn, in charge of vacuum cleaners, dusters and bleach and gone before we leave the house. Not so the pair that clean our block, which is a two story rabbit warren a bit like the Tardis. I get there around 8.15 and it’s usually bin emptying time – I must be annoying because mine has orange peel, plum stones and yoghurt pots- and the cleaners are noisy. They are sisters and both built for comfort rather than speed, one blonde, the other dark and a laugh a minute in their lavender tunics and trousers, pushing a trolley stuffed with spare loo rolls and soap refills.
Today, being Friday the dark sister told us she is going ‘on the lash’ tonight and when asked if she will be in a sorry state tomorrow she insisted that no that never happens. Her prophylactic is a full tummy and a glass of milk beforehand and lots of water at bedtime, I’ll check on Monday to see if it worked!
Last week I caught blonde sister teasing, really, really big time teasing our senior department manager, a reserved, formal man of few words. She actually called him a miserable old so and so, because he only grunts a reply to her cheery ‘good mornings’. I felt for him and tried to take it down a level by telling her how busy he is but she wouldn’t be halted. He later confessed that the situation was rather embarrassing, no doubt he has the wherewithal to deal with it.
I remember in the early part of my working life an outside company used to come each week to sterilize the telephones and twice a day a lady arrived with a trolley load of tea, coffee and biscuits. Those days are long gone, and now of course we have to clean our desks, and that’s fine.
Do you have a valiant team of office cleaners? Do you remember the days of the tea trolley? Perhaps you are the office housekeeper, if so I bet you have stories to tell?
the most ridiculous news story goes to . . .
Only in Essex, unless you can tell me otherwise?
I’m sure the ones in the photo above were delicious and very safe, photo by http://100cookbooks.wordpress.com/2013/01/09/dairyfree-vegan-flapjacks/
This made me laugh out loud, thanks to my friend Kathy.
The Paperless Future – "Emma".