We have one hundred words plus these four the line was drawn … for Julia’s challenge over at http://jfb57.wordpress.com/2012/07/23/100-word-challenge-for-grown-ups-week51/ why not give it a go? The prompt is announced every Monday. Here is my attempt for the week, it seems to have turned into one of those poemy things.
Demarcation
Between those that have
and those that have not
between those that can
and those that cannot
winners and losers
the line was drawn.
Between day and night
earth and sky
desert and ocean
between dark and light
the line was drawn.
Between leisured or laboured
able or challenged
between freedom and imprisonment
the line was drawn.
Between childhood and cronedom
innocence and guilt
lost and found
joy and sorrow
between crowd or solitude
the line was drawn.
Between having a voice
or condemned to silence
between discord and harmony
pleasure and pain
between ignorance and knowledge
the line was drawn.
You did an excellent job with the prompt.
BE ENCOURAGED! BE BLESSED!
Your ‘poemy’ thingy is really inspiring Gilly! I cannot for the life of me get how someone who said she couldnt write poetry can just spill the words onto a blank screen with such ease. For me every word is like a birth!
In my head, it develops into a slow, sad chant. That repeated line is very powerful.
Brilliantly done, Gilly. A powerful poem.
Beautiful, powerful, and insightful! Thank you, Gilly!
Wow I’m really impressed…
excellent gilly!!! i love to read your writing, always surprising, unexpected, though-provoking
my favorites:
1
Between freedom and imprisonment
the line was drawn.
2
Between ignorance and knowledge
the line was drawn.
3
Between having a voice
or condemned to silence
the line was drawn.
+
thanks for creating this inspiring poem, Gilly!
This was wonderful … a tale of contrasts, and the reality of life.
Very impressive indeed, Gilly. You write so well.
ah, but where? and by whom? Very well done…
A great take on the prompt.
Throughout you highlighted the choices that face us all each and every day.
Now this one is something special; the repeated line adds gravitas to it. Really excellent piece.
This is really powerful and beautifully written. I love your demarcations, but particularly childhood and cronedom for some reason.
I am breathless. Not only does this poem grab my attention and forces me to listen, the repeat of “the line was drawn” makes it even more powerful. Superb!
You are one of those poemy things..the ultimate poet who didn’t know-it—and sexy too…I love the…okay that’s the parts we leave to YOUR imagination…You Poetic Thingy…you
Very well constructed, the repetition extremely skilful.
Well done, Gilly! That repeated line has lots of impact. The comparisons, while free-flowing, are very poetic.
I thought this was a great poem, nice take on the prompt!
Great job!
This is a perfect use of the line for the challenge, Gilly. You do ao well with these.
I must get back to particiapting. I had started one but hadn’t finished. You inspire me.
Toodles,
Issy
Well done…very well done. Loved it!
Excellent work! I really like the repeated impact of the verses in this one.
Like this Gilly! And I really like ‘cronedom’ – love that.
Brilliant Gilly! Amazed at how easily you do this!
Sadly those lines are almost palpable here in the developing – as I am sure even more so in the underdeveloped – worlds.